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By the time I encountered a real-life penis, I already knew all the basic tricks in the book, plus some out-there ones my dude friends urged me not to try. I grew hesitant to bring it up with partners out of fear that asking them to perform the supposedly impossible feat of getting a woman off was too demanding. But when it came to their own pleasure, women held different expectations. Researchers Are Working on a New Condom That'll Enhance Pleasure Just like how blood flows to a penis when a person gets an erection, vulva-owners get a similar rush when they become aroused. You put it on, we were told, and then you have intercourse, and then someone ejaculates, and then you pull out and take it off. Amid all the advice we read about different ways to hold and touch a penis, many remain in the dark about vulvas and vaginas. As sociologist Lisa Wade points outthe orgasm gap is conditional. Found this article helpful?